小学生英语幽默故事10则

鱼儿快游

　Where is the egg?

　　Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?

　　Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.

　　Teacher:Then where is the “egg"?

　　Student:In the cake,Sir.

　　鸡蛋在哪里？

　　老师：你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗？

　　学生：可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。

　　老师：“鸡蛋”在哪？

　　学生：在蛋糕里，先生。

　　Child:My uncle has 1000 men under him.

　　Man:He is really somebody.What does do?

　　Child:A maintenance man in a cemetery

　　他真是一个大人物

　　小孩：我叔叔下面有1000个人。

　　男人：他真是一个大人物。他是干什么的？

　　小孩：墓地守墓人。

　　Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?

　　Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.

一名伟人

　　老师：如果莎士比亚还活着，他会是一名伟人吗？

　　学生：当然。因为到目前为止，还没有人活到400多岁。

　　Mr. Smith: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.

　　Waiter: Yes, sir, I know---it's the heat that kills it.

　　史密斯先生：服务员，我的汤里有一只死苍蝇。

　　服务员：是的，先生，我知道了，它是被烫死的

　Son: Dad, give me a dime.

　　Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?

　　Son: I guess you're right, Dad, Give me a dollar, will you?

　　儿子：爸爸，给我一角钱。

　　父亲：儿子，你不认为你已经长大了，不该再老是一角一角地要钱了(该自立了)，不是吗？

　　儿子：爸爸，我想你是对的，那给我一块钱行吗？

　 　A little kid fell in love with another little kid, a school mate. Sometimes the kids think they fall in love when they have a crush on someone else in the class, when they’re eight or ten years old or something like that. So the eight-year-oldkid came back home and asked his father, “Father, is it expensive to be married?” And the father said, “Yes, son, it is very expensive.” So the son asked, “How much does it cost?” And the father said, “I don’t know, son. I’m still paying.”

　 　有个小孩爱上了另一个小孩，对方是学校的同学。八岁或十岁左右的孩子有时会迷恋班上某个人，然后就以为自己恋爱了。因此这个八岁的小孩回家问他爸爸： 「爸爸，结婚很花钱吗？」爸爸说：「是啊，儿子，非常花钱。」儿子又问：「要花多少钱呢？」爸爸说：「我不知道，儿子，我到现在还一直在付钱啊！」

　 　"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?" "No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."

　　“孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了吗？”

　　“没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。”

“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”

　　“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”

　　“Yes，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”

　　“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”

　　“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”

　　“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”

　 　TWO： Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example?

　John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short.

　　老师：我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理。现在，谁给我举个例子？

　　约翰：嗯，在夏天天都长，在冬天天都短。

　 　The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"

　　"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".

　　教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了：“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了？”

　　“我来试试看，”一位老太太说。

　　“该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”